About five years ago, I wrote a blog about the issues I was having with a former client who owed my firm significant money. He had taken to the internet to disparage me and my firm in order to have leverage over his debt. The blog essentially centered on the help I received from others to deal with this sort of extortion.  Through that experience, I  learned how important it is to have a network of family, friends, and colleagues and that it is okay to ask them for help when you need it.

I have since also learned from that experience that this sort of “blackmail” is very prevalent in my area of practice. After I stepped forward and relayed my experience in my blog and posted the blog on various sites on the internet, numerous colleagues, all of whom I like and respect, told me about their similar experiences. It amazed me as to how wide spread this sort of internet extortion and cyber bullying is.  In addition, the attorney who was on the other side of my case just recently told me that it took him over a year to recover from the vilification my former client wrote about him on the internet.

Fast forward five years.  A few months ago, I  received a telephone call from a former client-who apparently had went through the funds she received in the divorce within months-seeking a refund of part of the fees she paid my firm.  I tried to discuss her “issues” with her but, when it became apparent that I would not be refunding her counsel fees, she essentially threatened me and hung up the telephone.  Within days, the internet posting began.

Even after what I went through the first time, my first instinct was to hide from the postings and not deal with them. When I realized I could not do so, I contacted Carol Shiro Greenwald to help me with this latest round. She was incredible and offered me numerous suggestions as to how I should proceed.   Her work in helping me was a shining example of the Gotham mantra, “What goes around comes around and it’s better to give than receive.” I have been following Carol’s instructions and, am starting to see some positive results.

This time around, I feel-with Carol’s help-that I was able to personally stand up to the cyber bully.  When I have clients who are clearly the victims of abuse I talk to them about using outside methods, i.e. therapists, to take back their power. I now know the tremendous sense of accomplishment that comes when one is able to truly stand up for themselves.

I am incredibly blessed that I have a close network of family, friends, and colleagues who stood up for me when I needed it and continue to do so. I am also thankful that I have been given the tools to stand up for myself.