One year, one moment
It will be a year tomorrow that I euphemistically got "hit by a bus." (If you're interested in reading about it click here.)
A lot has changed for me during this time and it's too easy to look back and relive the trauma. However, when I reflect, I think of a moment in the hospital that was very special.
It was in the afternoon around 1p and the sun was shining through the windows. I had just finished a delicious shrimp salad sandwich and was leaning back on a recliner. The window was open a bit and a gentle breeze was wafting through.
It was then I felt something I hadn't felt in a long time....true peace. It washed over me as I smiled and enjoyed a moment of blissfullness. It reminded me of the times I would sit at my drawing table in the middle of night and create, and even connected to me to when I was a little kid playing with reckless abandon. I had not a care in the world. The medical staff finally found out what was wrong with me and I had begun the process of healing. I was one with the world. It's a feeling that everyone experiences but few acknowledge it or evern realize it.
Although the pace of business, traffic, stress and all the issues that surround life conspire to prevent you from feeling peaceful, I practice every day to relive that feeling. I close my eyes, put my feet up on my desk and put myself in that moment. Sometimes I'm successful and other times I'm not.
A year later and I'm still experiencing the effects of my "event." I guess it will always be with me. But in amongst the trauma and fear was a moment that I choose to remember. I am grateful that I was aware enough to consciously experience it.

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And a funny thing to share (that I'd not have if I commented as my day started which remains my preference). After playing ball, doing some chores, reading the papers (still some more to go since they deliver part of tomorrow's Times.), I decided to play a 2007 John Fogerty concert I had open in my browser; I just sat back, put up my feet on my hassock. It was a perfect hour plus. I felt regenerated. And even more so after returning to my Mac and reading Mitch's blog.
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