[Fredslist] Learn from my estate planning nightmare

[Jane Beddall]

Brava, Erin!  You do a great service to talk about a "real life" 
scenario that has touched your family. We will all die someday and it's 
those we leave behind who can suffer if we do nothing to plan for our 
own death or don't give careful attention to planning. As you say, it's 
not necessarily easy, but it's very important. I hope your personal 
message will motivate some Gothamites to do what needs to be done!

Jane Beddall, M.A., J.D.
Dovetail Resolutions, LLC
203.887.1160
24 Dixwell Ave. #214
New Haven, CT 06511
jb at dovetailresolutions.com
http://www.dovetailresolutions.com

Mediation and Consulting --
Business Mediation
Family Wealth Mediation
Elder Mediation

On 9/20/2012 5:46 PM, Erin Ardleigh wrote:
>
> Don't let yourself go through the nightmare that my family is going 
> through due to a lack of estate planning!
>
> This is not a promotional post, it is in fact a very personal story 
> that I hope might motivate a few of you.
>
> My grandmother died in 2007, and 5 years later, her estate still is 
> not settled. She didn't believe in estate planning, and as a result, 
> gave millions to the government rather than to her family or a 
> charity. She did create a will, but didn't discuss her wishes with her 
> family and didn't pick a competent executor. The ensuing mess would 
> make a great reality TV show -- warring siblings, IRS penalties, angry 
> lawyers, a dead accountant (really!) mysterious heirs to a fortune, 
> never ending delays, and irreparable damage to a family.
>
> Don't be season two of this show! Make sure you and your family 
> members all have wills, health care proxies, trusts if appropriate, 
> proper (in force) insurance and that you tell someone about your 
> wishes. There are many wonderful people in Gotham that assist in this 
> process, including mediators that can help initiate what some find to 
> be a very difficult conversation.
>
> (BTW I'm NOT looking for professional advice or representation -- 
> unfortunately I did not have a say in who was hired, other than my 
> father's attorney. I wish I could've hired all Gotham members ;) I 
> have had wonderful CPA's and attorneys give me advice and help along 
> the way.)
>
> Again, I am sharing this so that others can learn from my troubles. 
> The silver lining to my experience is that my family members all see 
> the urgent need to do proper planning. However, too many people say to 
> me, 'oh I don't have a will, I'll get to it sometime' or 'I have no 
> idea about my parents' affairs -- it'll be a mess when they're gone'. 
> Trust me, when professionals in the estate planning business tell you 
> that you need to act now, it's not a high pressure sales technique -- 
> there is a serious risk to ignoring their advice. Don't learn that the 
> hard way.
>
> Erin Ardleigh
>

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