[Fredslist] Aunt Esta died on Friday. She was 100 years old.

[Joel Schnur]

Dear Along the Network:

 

At 8:45, this past Friday morning, my cell phone rang and Caller ID showed
that my Aunt Martha was calling and I immediately knew that was not a good
sign. "Joel, I have bad news. The nursing home called to tell me that Aunt
Esta passed away about an hour ago. The funeral home is making arrangements
for a graveside service but can you take care of getting a minyan (quorum of
10 adult males necessary for certain prayers to be said)together at the
cemetery?" 

 

I was then struck with the logistics. Jewish tradition calls for burying
the deceased within less than 24 hours. Aunt Esta was a widow with no
children. Candle lighting for the Sabbath was at 4:09 and the funeral was
for 11:30, in New Jersey. Everyone was already at work or on their way by
the time I would start to call them. Amazingly, of my 200+ cousins, their
spouses, children and grandchildren, about 183 of us are still Orthodox Jews
and that is with us being anywhere from 4th to 7th generation Americans. And
that's just on my mother's side!

 

Talk about Tribes, well our family is pretty close. Against her wishes, we
had moved Aunt Esta out of her East Flatbush apartment decades ago when the
crime rate soared and she went into a building in Brighton Beach owed by one
of the cousins. Same for Aunt Lee, age 96, who lives in Flatbush. Both paid
little to no rent because we take care of our own even when they can't
afford it. Since I also live in South Brooklyn, I would usually be the one
designated to pick them up and drop them for a family wedding or bar
mitzvah. It was always informative to hear them tell stories about the past
even when they argued about whose memory of events was more accurate. When
one of the cousins' children gets married and wants to start off living in
NYC, there is always an apartment for them and at a reduced rent. One of the
cousins recently needed some extra financial help to marry off a child
because the other side was insisting on a fancier wedding, so we all pitched
in. 

 

This was no different. The oldest living member of the Tribe would get the
full family treatment. I accompanied the body to the cemetery-considered a
big honor-and at the graveside I watched as seven cars drove up disgorging
family members from Brooklyn, Queens, Nassau, Rockland, Bergen and Monmouth
Counties all dropping whatever had been on their schedules on the shortest
Friday of the year to pay their last respects to one of our own. We buried
her next to Uncle Abe and still made it back home with an hour and a half
before Shabbos. We will be dividing up the reciting of the Mourner's Kaddish
during the next year.

 

My grandmother had 19 pregnancies, 15 live births but only 9 children who
lived to adulthood. Many children commonly from all ethnic backgrounds died
at the turn of the last century of pneumonia and other childhood illnesses.
Aunt Dinah, age 98, Aunt Ruth, age 89, Aunt Martha, age 92 and Uncle Murray,
age 86, are all that are left from that generation. We thank G-d that we are
still able to show them the respect they deserve, share happy occasions with
them an shower them with love. And we do that because not only because we
were brought up that way but we also want our children to know what family
is all about especially when our turn comes. 

 

Goodbye Aunt Esta. You had a pretty good run!

 

All the best, all of the time, to all of you.

 

Joel

 

___________________________

Joel Schnur

Senior VP

Government Affairs/Public Relations

Schnur Associates, Inc.

1350 Avenue of the Americas

Suite 1200

New York, NY 10019

 

Tel. 212-489-0600 x204

Fax. 212-489-0203 

joel at schnurassociates.com 

www.schnurassociates.com <http://www.schnurassociates.com/>  

 

-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: http://www.gothamnetworking.com/pipermail/fredslist/attachments/20101212/aac119bb/attachment.html