[Fredslist] The Passionate Speaker #83 Crossing the River

Thu Feb 15 08:53:52 EST 2007

eNewsletter

      The Passionate Speaker 

      A Monthly Newsletter for Speakers

      by 

      Mike Landrum

      February, 2007 - Number 83

      Crossing the River 

      "Look at the water, you'll hit the water; look at the green, you'll hit the green."

      - Old Golfer's Maxim

      "Once you learn to trust yourself, then you'll know how to live."

      - Goethe

            Contents

            Something to Ponder

            Keynote Topics

            Contact Info

            Coaching YOU
            CoachMike on TV!

            Coaching YOU
            If you or someone you know has a "mission critical" speech coming up and could use some professional guidance, call or email me now. The sooner we can start creating, composing and practicing your talk, the greater your chance of success. Speaking to a live audience is the most vulnerable point of leadership. Relax. You can have a performance specialist in your corner.
            917-647-7893
            Mike at CoachMike.com

            CoachMike on TV!
            Watch "The Early Show" on CBS this coming Saturday, February 17th and you'll see me as a representative of Toastmasters, giving advice on overcoming stage fright. Yes, it means getting up early on a weekend . . . the show goes from 7:30 to 9:00 a.m. - and I have no idea what time I'll appear. Do you have Tivo? and there's always videotape.
            Keynote Topics
            Bring The Passionate Speaker to your group or organization to speak in person! Choose from three entertaining and useful talks:

            "Personalizing PowerPoint" - Techniques to keep the power in your presentations while using the software to sharpen the point.

            "Acting Yourself" - Tips from a lifetime of acting that can make your presentations more authentic, dramatic, entertaining and persuasive. 

            "Sharpening the Tools of Expression" - Essential tips to improve your voice, body and mind as presenters.

            Call today for details on rates and schedules!
            For more info on Keynotes, click here. 

            * * *

            I grew up in Missouri, only a short drive from the Mississippi river. I was told the river began in northern Minnesota as a small stream so narrow that a person could easily step across it in a single stride. It's an image that sticks in the mind - especially for Missouri boys. The river flows through our lives and teaches lessons just by being there.

            Not long ago I interviewed a new business client, an executive of a large company who had an important speech to deliver. We were sitting in his office and talking about the goals we wanted to establish for our work together. I asked him what sort of speaker he would like to be.

            "I always admire speakers who can step out from behind the lectern and speak without notes," he said. 

            "You've been speaking quite fluently to me for over 20 minutes and I haven't seen a single note," I replied.

            He laughed and said "I wish I could speak to an audience as easily as I can talk to a person one-to-one."

            "I think that's a very good goal," I told him, "and it's one we should be able to reach."

            For speakers, everything depends on your perception of the gap between you and your audience. Some consider the gap a minor thing, like a small stream that they can step across in a single stride. Those are the speakers who can converse easily and naturally with their audience, no notes, no lectern - one-to-one with each person in the audience. 

            Sometimes we feel the gap is as wide as the Mississippi. Add more people and it's like adding water to the river; pretty soon the banks are so far apart that even shouting won't work well. We suddenly feel scared and distant. From across the river, the audience seems to melt together into a single huge organism with hundreds of eyes and heads and brains, all lurking in judgement. We feel nervous and insecure. We don't want to make any mistakes. 

            So we become extra choosy of which words we use; only perfect words will do. We write the whole speech out deciding exactly what we're going to say. Then we try to memorize it, or get a Teleprompter so we can read it off a piece of glass in front of the lectern - which means we have to stay at the lectern. Because we're not used to reading aloud to large groups of people, we don't do it very well, and we realize that. Our voices stiffen and our gestures get awkward and unnatural. All of a sudden the simple act of speaking feels like a totally foreign experience.

            That's because we're no longer focused on our listeners, we're focused on the speech. The audience is across the river on the other shore, but we're only concerned with the river. We've forgotten that each "audient" is a human being like ourselves, familiar with the joys of conversation. When we converse with one person it's like stepping across a small stream where we can build rapport and have a meaningful talk. No sensible Missouri politician would cross over to Illinois in order to speak across the Mississippi. Where rivers are concerned, if you want to speak to someone, you have to be on their side.

            How do we reduce the Mississippi to a small stream? We must give up our need to be perfect. In casual conversation about a topic that interests and excites you, would you normally be worried about making a mistake? If you're having a friendly chat with someone you like, would you bother to memorize a page or two? Would you hire a Teleprompter? Of course not. You can trust your brain to find the words to express your thoughts - especially in your area of expertise. 

            Our difficulties disappear when we understand that the goal is not to cross the river, but to reach the other shore. The gap, the river, is made up of our doubts and fears. Once we lose faith in our own brains' ability to find the right words to express our thoughts, we place a river between ourselves and our listeners. If we try to build bridges of elaborately written speeches or we perform great feats of memorization, we are making the river even wider. 

            As I often tell my clients, speaking should be easier that we make it. We want to get our ideas, thoughts and insights from our brains to those of our listeners on the other shore. We do this everyday in easy, normal conversation by simply allowing our brains to find the right words as they go. Being intelligent, articulate humans, this simple task is achieved as easily as stepping across a small stream. 

            Yes, we should organize those thoughts ahead of time. Yes, we should have a solid structure and make notes to follow. Yes, we should absolutely practice out loud. It is even desirable to memorize short passages, neat phrases or pieces of wisdom and wit. Yes, it is sometimes necessary to read aloud. But the bulk of the time we should trust our brains to find the words of the moment. Step over to your audience's side and have an easy conversation with them. You'll have more fun and so will they. My client followed this advice and made a very successful speech.

            © 2007 Michael F. Landrum

            * * *
            To Read Previous Issues of The Passionate Speaker, Click here

            Something to Ponder

            Be Careful What You Worship

            A person will worship something - have no doubt about that.

            We may think our tribute is paid in secret in the dark recesses of our hearts - but it will out. 

            That which dominates our imaginations and our thoughts will determine our lives, and character.

            Therefore, it behooves us to be careful what we worship, for what we are worshiping, we are becoming.

            Ralph Waldo Emerson

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            Contact Info

            Mike Landrum
            32 Hardscrabble Road - Suite 112
            Blooming Grove, NY 10914

            http://www.CoachMike.com 

            Mike at CoachMike.com

            917-647-7893

            The Passionate Speaker is a free email publication written and published by Michael F. Landrum. Feel free to distribute to friends, associates and organizations - provided you include this paragraph and the copyright and attribution. Further information on Mike Landrum, as well as previous issues of The Passionate Speaker can be found at the web site http://www.CoachMike.com. Do you have any questions, comments, complaints or praise? I welcome all feedback! You may reply to this email or directly to: Mike at CoachMike.com Thanks!

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             © 2007 Michael F. Landrum

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