I was back in Home Depot on Monday returning the grates for my grill. I had bought the wrong size the day before. After making the exchange I decided to go down the lumber aisles. My grandfather and father owned a lumber company on West 18th Street and seeing and smelling the fresh wood reminded me of them and the days I spent there as a kid. Of course, it wasn't just "wood". The aisles were stocked with premium pine, common board, birch, marker board, sheathing, oak, etc. There a lot of different kinds of wood. What was the difference between all these? I had no idea. My father must have known. He had a company brochure and I used to test him on it. I would ask "what is an M325?" and he would say "3 inch half round molding," or something like that.
Customers were carrying out sheets of lumber. I would never buy a sheet of lumber. What would I do with it? They must have known because most of them had on work boots and carried measuring tapes on their hips.
I explored more aisles in Home Depot, thinking there must be something I would be able to figure out, though I reminded myself I could not even get the right size grate on my grill without two trips. I came across and easy to install gutter system. I examined the pieces. End cap, center drop, gutter guard, drip edge. I wonder if I could put that together. But then I saw somethings called spike and ferrule and outside miter and I walked away.
The drill aisle was scary. I picked up a 3/8ths keyed chuck reversible drill after passing the angle die grinder and the roofing cutter. I then quickly returned the reversible drill to the shelf thinking that if it turned on by mistake and went in reverse it would put a hole in my head. And if that was bad, I walked briskly past the one handed bar clamp and spreader, and the 18 inch annihilator.
Another aisle over was plumbing, which had hundreds of items. I waited until someone asked a store clerk for help, just curious to see what they would ask for. They wanted a soil pipe adapter and a flush brushing. I wonder if I need those too.
I became despondent and looked at my soft smooth hands. All of this stuff made me feel incompetent. The only thing I have fixed is tightening the screws on the handles of our kitchen drawers.
Heading towards the exit I came across stacks of Charmin Ultra Soft. At least I know what to do with those.
Posted By : hydrajet